Cuddle up on the sofa, have a delicious dinner, or go for a walk to your favorite place—whatever’s your favorite way to spend quality time with your
partner, go do it!
Start thinking about what the perfect elopement day would look like for you both if there were no obstacles in your way.
Grab your partner’s hand (seriously, do it!) and shut your eyes. Think hard about the day you’re going to stand next to each other, holding each other’s hands like you’re doing right now, and saying your vows. Try to picture it all.
Make brainstorming about your best wedding experience a date night!
When you first start planning your elopement—the best mindset you and your partner can have is one with no boundaries. This part of the process has nothing to do with limits, so forget for a moment about what’s “feasible” and just let yourself dream.
I whole-heartedly believe that no single elopement or intimate wedding is exactly like another—just like there’s no couple out there that’s exactly the same. So don’t limit yourself to what you’ve seen on blogs, social media, from friends and family, or even from me. Your wedding day is about creating a day that’s going to make you feel the most alive, happy, relaxed, and in-love. This part of the planning process is all about letting your imagination go wild and envisioning the most enjoyable day for the two of you, that would celebrate your relationship in the most authentic way.
Forget about any restrictions for a moment and just dream big—that’s where you’ll find what speaks most to you. You’ll have time to figure out the details later.
What would your wedding day look like if there were no boundaries?
01
Dream Up Your Best Day
Now, ask yourself: Where are you? What do you see?
You don’t need to know specifics to give this experiment a go—this can be super vague to start. Are you on top of a mountain you’ve just hiked up? Are you hanging out in a rooftop bar looking out at the city lights? Are you standing between vines tasting wines? Are you sitting in a kayak on a river? Are you running hand-and-hand down a moody, sandy beach toward a picnic blanket decked out with your favorite treats?
There are no wrong answers. The most important thing is to try to let go of what anyone else thinks and to avoid shooting down ideas for not being practical (just yet).
Pro Tip:
Looking for a few creative questions to get the brainstorming going? Here’s some questions to think about together:
• What have been the best days that you two have had together as a couple? Where were you and what did you do together?
• Describe how the perfect elopement day would feel—are you relaxed? Excited? Happy? Content? Free of any and all stress? Really talk about the feeling you’re chasing.
• Close your eyes and picture your wedding day—what’s it like? Are there other people around? Or is it just you? Do you see busy streets, family & friends, your dog(s), or an empty landscape?
• What does the scenery look like? Do you see mountains? A city skyline?
A waterfall? An ocean? Cliffs? A desert? A lake? A cabin in the woods? A vineyard? A beach?
• What about the weather, temperature, and what you are wearing? What would be the most comfortable and the most “you”?
• How much time are you dedicating to your elopement? Is it part of a honeymoon trip? Is it a weekend adventure in your favorite spot or a multi-week trek somewhere new?
• Who do you see there with you on your day? Your friends? Family members? Your furry best friend? Or are you craving a “just for us” day?
• What are you doing on your day together on your wedding day—are
you going out for a drive or going on a hike? What about relaxing in a hammock or soaking in a hot spring?
• What does your ceremony look like? Are you reading vows? Are there
religious or traditional aspects? Is there something meaningful you’d love to include that’s special for you?
• How did you fall in love—are there ways you want to implement that into your ceremony? A special place? A special moment? A special song?
• Are you eating your favorite foods on your elopement day? Drinking your
favorite beverages?
Prompts to inspire you as you brainstorm
Write down all the ideas that are sparked during this process so that you can refer back to them later on when you're making concrete decisions.
Pro Tip:
Have one intimate ceremony
an elopement is still an elopement if you have guests
How to involve family + friends on your wedding day
Split up the day
Include them in other intimate moments
Spread it over two days
like an intimate dinner
Planning a single ceremony to include your family and friends in your wedding is a beautiful way to have the people closest to you standing right by your side as you commit your lives to each other. The only caveat is that you might have to consider making compromises about the ceremony location to make sure to accommodate everyone’s needs.
If you want to involve your family and friends in your ceremony, but don’t want to make compromises on your ceremony location, you can have a private vow-reading with just you and your partner and then have another ceremony with your family and friends during a different part of the day. You can choose to read the same vows for both ceremonies or you can keep your vows private and have a different type of ceremony in front of your family and friends. This way, you get to read your vows in total privacy, in the exact location you’re envisioning, but also have a meaningful ceremony with your closest people next to you.
Your family and friends can be physically present and involved in your wedding day, even if you don’t necessarily want to have a ceremony with them. You can invite them to help you get ready or see your first look before sending you off to have an entirely private ceremony by yourselves. Or you can invite them to just take some formal portraits with you afterward and have a celebratory dinner in the evening.
If you like the idea of doing two ceremonies but feel like that would make for a very long day—spreading your elopement experience over two days can be the perfect solution to really being able to relax and not feel super rushed or exhausted. You can include your friends and family on the first day and then have a second day all to yourselves. Or you can have your dream 2-person elopement experience on day 1 and then celebrate and take photos with your friends and family on the following day.
